First an update on me. I'm back in LA and loving it. It's so nice to sleep in my own bed and to be surrounded by own stuff. You forget how much your stuff really affects you, ya know? Like my CDs, movies, pictures, poster of Keira Knightly; it's all so comforting. I feel like I am back in my command center.

I've been going to the Improv a lot now and getting my face seen again. It's nice there, right when I walked in I had a lot of people welcome me back, and I got free drinks! Yay Jew! Plus I've been hanging out with my friends whom I haven't seen in almost 2 months. My god, I was away for a long time. I hate those long trips.

My next long trip will be in September, but that's when I tour Europe with Pablo, so that will at least be exciting. I mean this time I spent 7 weeks in Florida. Granted I saw family and friends, but one more week and I would've killed somebody...hopefully it wouldn't have been someone I know. Well, maybe that one kid in 5th grade who used to pick on me. I actually remember his name: Klaus Oakler. Yeah, who'd have thunk a kid named Klaus would be picking on the Jew? If Klaus is out there, hope you're doing well, but dude, you really fucked with me in school.

I mean I'm over it really, but those little things still stay with you, ya know? I can remember my first bully: Klaus. My first crush: Michelle Archeolla (may have spelled that wrong), my first heartbreak: Erin Boscowin, the first girl I had sex with: I won't say her name, but she knows who she is. The first time I did stand up: 1983, (talent show) the first time I did stand up in a 'club': Dec. 13, 1992.

Anyways, I rambling now. The point is, it's great to be home.

So what's on my mind? Well, level 9 shit, sorry. I guess I'll have to sort it out without the benefit of blogging. Eh, I think I'm making a bigger deal out of something than it already is. And for those of you who know me well (Dave), it is what you think and shut up.

Well kids, it's late and I'm tired, so I'm going to say night-night to you. Hope your day is full of fun and remember to think positive, it helps. I really does.

OH...to anyone in the central Florida are, August 8...Jokeboys Comedy Club...one night only...SKIPPY GREENE LIVE!!! No shit.

6/16/07
OK, so this is weird, the only place around here with wireless is a Krystals burger place...so I'm sitting here, eating mini burgers and typing away. Nice, huh?

Well I'm sure you're all wondering, "Hey Flip, did you do the show last night without cursing??" Yes I did...well, I did say 'fuck', but no more than four times. And you know what, it wasn't difficult at all. Just goes to show that sometimes you have say, 'freak it!' It did make a difference I think. I did have to cut out a bit or two completely, but it didn't affect the show.

Like I had said before, I like to be free on stage and say what I want when I want to. But to be challenged as I am this weekend, it's not a bad thing. And you know what else...I did 'The Shark Bit' last night, and because I didn't curse as much, it went really well. I'm thinking I might start to bring that joke back as my closer.

Well, I can't talk too much longer, I got some clothes at a laundry mat and I've got to switch'em out. Ahh...what a life. Wireless at Krystals, washing clothes at a laundry mat, drinking sweet tea. Life on the road...or maybe it's just life in Ocala. ;)

6/14/07
Evening all, I'm now lying in bed at the condo in Ocala. I had my first show tonight at Jokeboys Comedy Club and it went really well. The crowd was great, club is great, staff is great....everything was great. Until...

Well, it's not a big thing, but just something that kinda threw me.

Before the show the owner told me that the show is PG-13 and that he told people there was adult language and adult content, but that it wasn't the whole show. And I've never considered myself a dirty comic; I know I curse, but the profanity was there because that's just how I'm comfortable talking. To me it should be very conversational when I'm up there, the way I talk to my friends. So that's why I'm fine cursing. And I have a few jokes that are sexual, but I never thought graphic.

Anyway, the first two comics go up, and they were really, really funny. I'm not just saying that either, they were. I was actually worried about following them. But I noticed that neither of them really cursed. Just an occassional 'shit' here and there. So I was thinking if I should cut back or just do my show. I opted on the later and the crowd (as far as I could tell) was fine with it. They seemed to like it.

After the show the owner pulled me aside and nicely and respectively asked why I cursed so much. Actually, I believe his exact words were, "Man, I didn't know that you couldn't breath without saying fuck." It was pretty funny. He explained that he adversised me as PG-13 and asked if I could cut it back. He also showed me a comment card in which a woman said, "The first two guys were great, the last...disgusting." That really threw me.

So for the rest of the week I'm going to be aware of my language. I mean it's not like I've never had to do clean shows, I just hate not being in the moment and going with my gut as far as what to say and how to say it. I mean there are jokes that I have where the curse word is written in it, and with those I can easily change it. But I'm talking about when I improv; when I'm working off the cuff. Generally I curse, again, it's conversational. Like if I was just talking (not doing material) with some friends and they said something and I said, "Oh fuck you. That's bullshit." That's fine, and when I'm improving with the audience, I like to feel I can say that kind of thing and be fine. But now I think I'm going to have to watch it a bit.

And I'm not blaming the club; this town is a bit conservative I think and the club is new. I don't want them to lose business because I was cursing. And I find doing shows like this to be a nice challenge. As much as I hate being so aware of what I'm saying, it's always refreshing to know that I am able to do it. I'm sure the rest of the week will be fine.

I guess what got me was that some woman called me "disgusting". Is it disgusting to just be yourself? I mean I know the comedy is subjective; I've always said that. I've gotten nasty emails and comments on my myspace page, and I take it all with a grain of salt. But those were just general things, "You suck", "Dane Cook wannabe" (seriously), etc. But this one was just so specific: DISGUSTING. I dunno, I guess I'm not going to please everyone, right? Right.

Tomorrow I am doing radio so I'm going to call it a night, night.

6/11/07
OK, so I got lazy and decided not to walk to the lobby anymore to check my email. Screw it, I was on vacation. Then again, my life is mostly a vacation; but this time it really was a vacation.

So now I'm sitting at my brothers' house because he has wireless. God bless'em.

I can't thank the good people at Club Med for a great time. The staff was just great. Actually, Vinnie and I did a free show for them to show our appreciation. I got me a standing-o, but that's neither here nor there. Wellll, maybe it's a little there. In all seriousness, thanks.

I've got a few more days off and then I go to Jokeboys in Ocala. THEN I go back to LA. And I am ready! Don't get me wrong, I loved seeing my friends and family, I loved headlining for over 2 months, and I loved making some good money...but damn, I'm ready to get back to my life out there. It's so frustrating to know that things are happening and I'm missing them...like the Paris Hilton trial! (insert 'valley girl' voice) "I soooo wanted to be there to protest it. It's sooo not fair. Oh-me-gaw!" All I have to say is that she deserved it. No one should be above the law. Unless it's me.

OK, I'm gonna relax a bit. I took a yoga class today and I'm tired, sore and exhausted. But in time I may be able to put my legs behind my head and then...well, you won't hear from me for a loooooooooooooooong time. :)

6/5/07
Hi there my friends, I am now sitting in the lobby of Club Med in Port St. Lucie, FL. The only wireless is in the lobby, so I won't be updating this blog for awhile since I'll be too busy sunbathing, drinking and water skiing....aw, my life can suck, no?

I'm actually kinda burnt now. I hate those sun headaches you get when you get too much sun.

Anywho, just wanted to drop a line and say hi. Hope you're doing well, cya later.

6/2/07
Hello everyone, I hope you're doing well. I'm sitting here in my hotel room in Melbourne, FL. watching a special on Cults. Strange...and scary.

So last night I had an interesting moment on stage. Let me give you a friendly piece of advice: Always, always, ALWAYS...make sure a woman is pregnant before you say, "Hey, you're pregnant!" Because if she isn't...oh boy, you create quite the tension in a room of strangers. Wow, it was a really weird moment. But I swear, when this girl walked in, maybe it was the way she stood or her dress, but she looked pregnant. Not fat; pregnant. And she and her boyfriend were sitting up front, so I mentioned it and her face went red! Red! Red! And he said, "Oh great, now I'll be hearing about this for a month.

At this point I know I said something wrong, but I wasn't sure if she was pregnant but didn't want to call attention to it, or if she wasn't pregnant...and I just royally fucked up. Turns out to have been the later.

Somehow I got out of the hole and the show ended up being fine. I still feel bad about that. Funny too, Brian Regan has a joke about that and I was just listening to his CD not 2 days ago. Bizarre.

Speaking of CDs...I've got a new one that should be ready in a few months. I'm really happy with it. I recorded it at Sidesplitters Comedy Club in Tampa a month ago. I'm still cleaning up the audio; it's got some background noise on it. But the material is really funny; it was a great show. I've listened to it a few times and it still makes me laugh. If that's not saying something, I don't know what is. As for the name of the CD...well, I'm keeping that one a secret...for now. (insert evil laugh)

Anyway, I'm about to get some lunch and enjoy and slightly overcast day. Hope you guys are smiling and I'll talk to ya later.