I'm a little worried right now, only because it's snowing here in Toledo and I'm flying to Detroit on a little plane. I'm sure I'll be fine, but I can faintly here "Labamba" being played in my head. Oh well, if I don't make it, at least I died doing what I like.

Actually, for that to be true, right as the plane is hitting the ground, I should be telling a joke to a hot girl who's blowing me while I'm watching Lost...then I'll truly have died doing what I like. :)

Last night's show was pretty good; although the crowd was not a vocal crowd. I never understood that; people who come to a comedy show but are afraid to laugh out loud. They just smile or laugh without sound. It kind of threw me off, but afterwards so many people told me they had a great time. So much thanks to Lourdes College...and to all the schools on this tour: Wooster, Edinborough, Harrisburg & Lourdes. Good times, good times.

I'm ready to get home, take a couple of days off and then...back on the road.

This is really a hectic travel time for me. All part of the rock 'n' roll life.

Well, the place just arrived so I assume that we are going to board soon, so I'm going to head out. I'll try to blog some more either on my layover or when I get home today.

Actually, I probably won't blog back home. I've got a show tonight and I think I am meeting a friend for some bowling. Yes, I bowl...and quite well I might add.

2/27/09
I think I am pretty much the definition of exhausted right now. Pure and simple. I drove from Middletown, PA. to Sylvania, OH...7 fucking hours! Not to mention the time I had to stop for gas and food (God bless you Sbarro). Plus it was raining and snowing...and not the pretty, "I'm dreaming of a white Christmas" kind of snow, I'm talking, "Fuck me, this is depressingly gray" kind of snow.

But I'm here...and now I have to go and do my last show of this lil college tour. Many thanks to those who came to the shows; and Alex (from Harrisburg), good luck with the comedy my little clone.

So this blog will be short because I need to get ready for my show. I really wish I didn't have one now just because I'm so tired.

I feel like a battery that is winding down, but rather than turn off the machine to give the battery a rest, I'm just going to let it run out by itself. At least I know I'll sleep well tonight.

And then tomorrow, I get to get up early, drive to the airport and fly home! Yay!

...that wasn't sarcasm, I'm happy to be going home.

So you guys stay groovy and let's do lunch, k?

2/25/09
Why is it that I blog more frequently when I'm on the road? I guess it's because I'm just so bored all of the time. Like now...

I'm sitting in my hotel room in Middletown, PA. and I'm just getting ready to head out to the show.

Oh, last night I did a show in ... oh my god, I seriously cannot remember the name of the town I was in last night. I remember where I was the night before and I know where my next show is going to be, but for some fucking reason I can't remember where I was just this morning. Fuck!

EDINBORO, PA!! That's it!

Of course I had to look it up on my iphone...wow, I'm really out of it.

Anyway, last night I had a really interesting show. Long story short, I was in a cafeteria (not the first time) but there were (and I'm not exaggerating) 12-15 people watching me. So bizarre. I still did 54 minutes and I did well...considering. But the lesson here was a double-edged one.

On one hand, it was a bit embarrassing to stand there and do my "show"...I use that term loosely since it was really mostly crowd work and not too much of my actual material.

But on the other hand, it showed me, once again, that the comic's life is not always full of great, big crowds and made me humble...BUT, it also showed me that I still did a good job with shitty circumstances. I still got laughs, the people who hired me were happy and I had to pat myself on the back for pulling through.

Now if the crowd had sucked or something, I probably would've just babbled and ended right at 50. But they were good.

Also have to give much thanks to the folks at Wooster for a really fun show.

So tomorrow I have the day off and I'm going to see a couple of friends who live in the area; always fun. But Friday...Friday is going to suck royally. I didn't realize how far my next show is...7 hours! I have to leave early Friday, drive 7 hours to the next gig, barely have time to shower and eat, then it's off to perform. Hey, all part of the job, but it still sucks.

Today I drove 5 hours to the hotel. I could've napped today, but then I would've been awake later tonight and I just want to sleep when I'm done.

I recently watched Mr. Saturday Night again, and let me tell you, that movie really captured what it's like for a comic to be on the road really well. The montage where Buddy Young Jr. is going from gig to gig (bowling alleys, chinese restaurants, etc.) and then you see him in his hotel room just watching TV, eating food and pacing; that's it man.

It's not always like that, sometimes you share the time with other comics or you're in a condo...but usually those are week long gigs or a tour of one-nighters (one night gigs) with another comic. For colleges, it's usually just like that. One hotel after another, one college after another, and one (usual) lonely night after another.

Uh-oh, pity party for one?

Don't get me wrong and don't feel sorry for me. Like I've always said, it's the life I chose and soon enough I'll be able to just fly in for one gig and fly out. Which I have done a few times. :)

Also, the money isn't bad...so again, don't feel bad for ol' Flipper.

OK, I'm going to get some caffeine and get ready for the show. Talk to you later.

2/23/09
And so it goes, I'm back on the road. I'm sitting in Atlanta on my layover to Toledo, and then I rent a car and drive to Wooster where I have a show at 10:00 PM tonight at the college there.

Then it's driving gig to gig through Friday.

I love this job, but I just hate the side-effects to it, ie: the process of traveling.

But, tis the price I pay for the life I lead.

So what to report? Well, the 3rd performance of "Fustercluck" went really well. Though I was exhausted from (literally) flying in to LA at 4:55 PM, waiting forever for my luggage (another perk of my job) and a long cab ride. I had maybe 40 minutes to relax and shower before I was out the door to do the show.

Later that night I hung out with some friends, got silly and slept soooo well.

Then I had yesterday to get some things done and I was asleep by 10:30 because I had an early fight today.

The Oscars were pretty cool, though no big surprises. Slumdog Millionaire swept, and Heath Ledger won. I still have to see Slumdog; that and The Wrestler are the two I really want to see.

I have a day off this week, maybe I can sneak a movie in.

OH, sidenote. Remember my last blog entry (if you don't...uh, just look beneath this blog) where I had a problem with that Mophie thing? Well, I had spoken to the company and was all ready to return it for a refund, when...just as a lark, I plugged the mophie into my iphone cord attached to my computer and...it worked!

Then I put two and two together...or one and one, whatever. I figured out that the power cord I orginally plugged it into was a firewire, and though it charged my iphone, it did not charge the mophie. But the power cord on my computer was a USB cord, and that worked fine. So now I know and the mophie is working just great.

I don't know why I decided to blog about that...actually, I do. This is going to sound kind of silly, but that day (my last blog) was so bad and that mophie thing was part of it, that the fact that I fixed that problem made me feel a bit better. Maybe something will happen with the airline (since I wrote them and complained about how unfair it was to charge me additional money to fly back, when they should've at least TOLD me that I would need to let them know of a change), and that would make that day even less shitty.

I would pray for some kind of miracle with the speeding ticket, but I have a feeling that is a lost cause. :(

Anyway, I'm going to get ready to board. I'll talk to you later.

2/21/09
Where to begin...I am having one of the more shittier days that I've had in awhile.

Funny enough, this trip started off great.

Tuesday I flew to Vegas where I was to spend the next 3 days writing for Terry Fator, and hanging out with the other writers whom I've grown to really like. We have a blast working together and to top it off...we get paid pretty good money. Not to mention a free trip to Vegas. Bonus, I left $40 richer from playing blackjack. :)

Now, I had a private show in Austin after the Vegas trip. To tell you the truth, I wasn't really looking forward to it. Nothing against the people who hired me, but because it was a corporate show. Which means that usually a comedian has to reel himself in a bit. What does that mean? Essentially, no cursing for the most part. But it's also (usually) set up in the "not so best" circumstances. But wait...I'm getting ahead of myself.

The point is, I just wanted to go home; for some reason, I had a bad feeling about this show.

So, I leave my Vegas hotel and share a cab to the airport with another comic. When I get there, I am about to enter a long security line, but...what's this...a whole NEW line opens up and I am first. So I just breeze through security. Hm...maybe this trip won't be so bad.

While in the airport, I decided to splurge on myself (that's spend money, not some kind of ejaculation euphamism) and I buy something called a Mophie. Basically a battery pack for an iphone that I saw Terry's manager and another guy in Terry's orgainization had. I got it from an Apple vending machine in the airport. (That's Apple like the company, not the fruit) And this thing is charged right out of the box. So cool.

So I get on the plane, finish Terry Fator's autobiography (which wasn't too bad actually) and I watch a video on my iphone. But when my battery starts to get low, I plug it into the Mophie and...

What the fuck!?

It's not working now. No charge; nothing. "OK", I thought, "Maybe it wasn't fully charged out of the box. I'll just charge it when I get to my hotel. No biggie."

I get off the plane, get my luggage and look at my watch. It's 7:10 PM, the show's at 9:00 and the gig is 30 minutes away. So long as I get my rental car and leave, I've got plenty of time.

I go to Alamo to get my rental car...

What the fuck!?

Apparently, they over booked by "126%"...yes, that's the actual quote the woman told me. "But", she said in her sweet lil Texas drawl, "Our sister company, Enterprise, is going to give you a car at the same rate." "OK", I say, "But I am in a bit of a hurry because I have to perform a show in an hour or so, can you get me up to the front of the line?" "Well", she says with a look of 'I doubt it', "I'll see what I can do."

We get to Enterprise and...

What the fuck!?

There's a long line AND only one person working there!

The woman goes up to the counter, talks to the guy for a second and then she comes back to me (I don't like the look in her eyes). "Sorry, he can't take you ahead of the other people."

So I wait about 20-25 minutes in the line. Now I'm starting to stress. I call my contact at the show and leave her a message explaining how my rental car fucked up, but that I am in town and I will be there soon. I get to the counter and (thankfully) get a GPS system in the car and after walking to the car lot, I get in my car. I look at the clock, "7:59", the show's 30 minutes away. OK, if there's no traffic and I rush a little, I should be there in time to change and maybe grab a bite.

I'm off. And thank god I got that GPS, cause this was a confusing route.

On the way the woman calls me and asks where I am, I tell her (it's 8:15 now) I'll be there by 8:30. She says ok, but I put the pedal to the metal. And there's no way I'm stopping for a bite now.

The GPS guides me this way and that way and I finally get to the street that'll take me to the hotel. 2 miles to go.

As I make a left I see that someone just got pulled over, "boy, that sucks" I think. Then I look in my rear-view mirror and see sirens flashing. I think, "Wow, another cop car. This guy must've done something bad to warrant two cop cars showing up." Then I realize that he's not stopping where the first cop car is. "He's not following me, is he?"

What the fuck!?

Yup, he is following me. I had apparently been speeding in order to get to my show on time. Honestly, I didn't even notice a speed limit sign. But I can't deny it, I was speeding. I explain my situation to the cop, but to no avail. He is cool, but still gives me the citation. I didn't even look at the fine, I just left...going the speed limit this time.

I get to the hotel, look at my watch, it's 8:37. Fuck!!!

I check in, change really quickly and before I leave my room the phone rings. I know exactly who it is. I tell them that I'm leaving my room right now.

I get to where the gig is and it is a conference/meeting room in the hotel. Not as bad as some rooms, but definitely not the most condusive for comedy. The woman in charge (not the one that I had been in contact with) looks like she's ready to kill me. She said to me, "Oh thank god. I kept thinking, 'where the fuck is this guy?'" I tell them about my speeding ticket and the rental car nightmare; she didn't look like she cared. I ask about language, and she said, "English is good". OK, she's trying to defuse the tension, I appreciate that. She tells me basically not to be too blue (dirty) and not to say fuck.

Wow, that's the one word I've been saying all night.

I get about a couple of minutes to get my head together and try and think of a set. Granted, I should've done this on the plane, but I thought I'd have time before the show. Usually when I do a corporate show, I like to base my act around the company (and I did have a joke or two about them) but I also like to watch the event for a little bit and think of some quick jokes then and there. But I did not have that luxury this time out.

So within another minute the woman is introducing me. And boy oh boy, did she introduce me. She was literally reciting, word for word, my bio on my website. People don't care that I started doing comedy when I was 8, or that my parents were proud when I started making money...just get to the credits that I've done and bring me up.

So I'm kind of laughing as she's doing this, and I think, "OK, this might be fun."

Well she brings me up and, long story short (too late) I didn't just ok. I got some laughs here and there, but on the whole, I felt I feel short of what I know I can do. Granted, I was having quite a shitty day, but that's no exuse. I was all over the place in my act; jumping from joke to joke without any real connection. I was cutting jokes short if they weren't working, I was editing out a "fuck" here and there. I did some crowd work that kind of worked.

After the show, I was relieved, but also slightly embarrassed. To my surprise, I had a lot of people telling me how good it was, including the woman who initially was my contact. I still feel that they were being nice, but I do appreciate the love.

I get my check (always a relief) and I get a sandwich at the hotel restaurant.

I go back to my room and then I remembered, "Oh yeah, the Mophie. Let's charge it." I plug it in and...

What the fuck!?

It's not charging. I double check to make sure that the outlet is working...yup, my iphone is charging fine. So now I'm thinking, "Fuck, I have to call this company and demand a new one!" Of course, this is Friday and I'm pretty sure that they're going to be closed for the weekend.

OK, I'll call Monday.

(By the way, I'm writing this in the Austin airport Saturday afternoon)

So I call a friend back in LA, talk briefly and then I try to pass out and think about waking up refreshed. But for some reason, I have a hard time falling asleep. My mind is racing. Finally, about 2:30ish, I drift off.

I wake up this morning, still groggy, but I get up, shower, pack and leave.

When I get in my car, I remember the citation and take another look at it. I never even checked to see how much the citation is for. "$10 for every mile over" Oy...wait...

What the fuck!?

Another $102 dollars for court costs!? So that makes it just over $240!? Fuuuuuuck me!!!!

So not fucking fair. I know, I know, I was speeding and I should pay. But c'mon. That's just ridiculous. I wasn't speeding in a school zone...hell, for that money, I should've had to have sped through a fucking school!

well, nothing I can do about it now. Luckily, I have the money.

I get to the airport with an hour to spare and I'm just eager to get on a plane and go home.

I go to self check in, trying to get my boarding pass. And they can't seem to find me in the system. I check my itinerary, American, I'm good.

I go up to the guy at the counter and he looks me up. Something's wrong.

OK, everyone now...

WHAT THE FUCK!?

OK, here's the situation (my parent's went away on a weeks vacation....sorry). When I initially booked this ticket with American, it was for me to fly in from LA on Friday and fly back on Saturday. Then I got the gig with Terry in Vegas, so I got a new inbound ticket with US Air and was just going to keep my return flight with American.

Well, unbeknownst to me, I had to call American and tell them about my change. So when I didn't show up on my flight out of LA, they jus cancelled my whole ticket...return flight included.

So, I had to pay another $150 to come home today! The guy at the counter was cool and told me that usually I'd have to buy another full ticket that would cost $400. So I thank him for that.

So my friends, that is where I am at now. I'm sitting in the terminal in Austin, waiting for my new flight to leave. OH, and did I mention that I have my sketch show tonight? Yeah, I do.

I know that things could be worse, I know that I need to put things in perspective. I am totally aware.

And yes I know that in the long run I'm still very lucky to be doing what I do for a living and that I do have the money to cover everything extra that I've had to spend. And believe me, I am grateful for everything and more.

But even billionaires have bad days and bitch. Everything is relative and the past day has just been a rather fucky one.

But I am on my way back home and tonight, after a fun show and (hopefully) some karaoke, which is the best tension breaker, I will sleep soundly in my own bed.

So I bid you adue my weary bloggers and I will talk to you later.

2/17/09
Once again I am at the airport, sitting on the floor, charging my cel phone and updating my blog. Ah the life I lead.

I'm on my way to Vegas to write for Terry Fator (I was just here not one month ago). I still love this gig, but damn I hate fucking traveling. I was just at the airport last week.

I know, I know...this is not the worst thing in the world, actually, it's one of the better things in the world to be doing. I've always said that I love to go to new places, I just hate the process of getting there.

Oh, and that reminds me, when the fuck will the airlines stop charging us for luggage!?

Have you not heard, there is a recession going on and we are having a hard enough time paying high prices for airline tickets as it is, now you're charging extra for a bag!? Fuck you in your engines!

I'll tell you what, it's either one or the other. You either give us a free meal or free luggage...we are NOT paying for both. Fuck you.

OK, I've vented.

I think we're starting to board...talk to you later.

No wait, they're just announcing that now there is a new size-limit for our carry-ons. OK, fuck you again, I'm not checking my carry on.

So last night I did a spot at the Ramada Inn (it has been a while since I did spots there) and it was really fun. But what made me feel even better was that two different comics referenced Skippy to me...plus the other night at the HaHa, another person (not even a comic) recognized me as Skippy. Skippy is really gaining acclaim. It's amazing.

I know I've said this before, but I just know that Skippy is going to be the thing that pushes me over. I just feel it!

OK, now I'm going to get ready to board. Hope it's not going to take too long...I don't want to be bored while waiting to board. Oh was alliteration!

2/15/09
Happy post Valentines Day everyone. Did you have a lovely day of love with your special someone? Good to hear.

For once I'm not going to say the stereotypical thing that single folk (like myself) would say..."Oh, well fuck you and you love."

I actually think I may be moving past that...which is good.

Then again I'm so weird that tomorrow I might just go back to Bittersville, population: Me.

I honestly feel that Valentines Day (as nice as it is in theory) is such bullshit. Honestly, every day you should tell the people that are close to you how much they mean to you.

I mean other "holidays" are there to celebrate or honor something legitimate.

Thanksgiving celebrates the pilgrims first meal in this country, Christmas celebrates the birth of a real person who became a religious figure, Martin Luther King Day celebrates a man who struggled for equality and peace...etc.

Valentines Day celebrates nothing. It's supposed to celebrate love, but as I said, that should be every day. So in essence, it's a day that is celebrating something that happens everyday.

It would be the equivalent of us having a holiday every November 10 celebrating the sun coming up.

...and yes, November 10 is also my birthday...which SHOULD be a holiday. :)

So last night I actually did 2 shows. One was my sketch show, FUSTERCLUCK, and to be honest, I wasn't too happy with it. There were major screw ups on my part and a huge, fucking distraction on another persons' fault.

During our performance, there was a group of guys (one of whom is a friend of mine) in the lobby of the theatre, and they were getting ready to do their show next door at the Improv. So at once point, they just got really, really loud and had no consideration for the fucking show that was being performed in the next room.

Now I know they weren't doing in on purpose, they probably didn't realize how loud they were. But just common sense (not to mention professional courtesy) would tell them that if they were going to talk and get ready, fucking go outside of the theater. Go into the parking lot.

So anyway, when they got loud, I actually broke character and yelled something like, "Hey, shut the fuck up, we're at a show!" Something like that.

That just put me in a fucked up mood for the rest of the show.

And the audience was kind of quiet, so that also affected me.

I'm so easily swayed by a quiet audience. And usually they're not bored or anything, they're just not loud laughers.

So after that, I went to the HaHa Cafe and had a great fucking show! That really helped get me out of my funk. Plus I tried a brand new joke and it worked!!!

That always feels good.

So now I'm just sitting at Starbucks doing some writing for Terry Fator; I'm going to Vegas in a few days to work on the show with the other writers.

This job is so much fun. I love the challenge of writing for another person steadily and actually helping craft a Vegas show. I feel so Rat-Packy.

Well kids, I'm off. Going to run some errands and later on tonight...KARAOKE TIME!!!

Later.

OH, I posted this on my facebook and myspace, but in case any of my friends from Europe visits this site, I'll repost it here:

Greetings my friends across the ocean, I hope you guys are all doing well.

I've been getting a lot of emails about this, so I figured it would be easiest to just send out a mass email to everyone.

Unfortunately, I will not be going back on the European Tour with Pablo in March. I already had some committments and it would've just been too hard to pull it off this time. But Pablo is bringing two really funny comics with him, and I'm sure you guys are going to love them.

I am hoping to be back your way sometime within this year; let's all keep our fingers crossed. I really hope that when I do come on back, you guys will be at the shows so that, once again, we can all have a blast together.

OH, and make sure the BB's are first in line. :)

So have a great time with Pablo and I'll see you guys soon!

Hei, hei ... Farvel ... Hej då ... Bless ... BYE!

-Flip

2/7/09
So sorry for the lack of blogging as of late, I've been busy getting my sketch show ready to open...which it does tonight! I can't believe it's here already. I remember I had the idea of doing another sketch show way back in August of last year I think. So I called my buddy Lenny (who I've worked with a lot) to see if he was interested in doing a show and he said "sure". So we thought February would be perfect, gives us enough time to write, cast, reherse, etc.

Next thing you know...Fuck, it's February.

The show is really good, I'm proud of it. Tonight might be a little weird; opening nights usually are. We've never done a full run-through, so we're doing a full rehearsal just before the show.

I actually like it when it's not "too" rehersed, you know? Where's there's still a chance for some improvising and fooling around.

The cast is really good too, I'm getting to work with some friends which is always fun.

So what else?

OH, I found an amazing website for downloading music. Forget iTunes, Amazon...except if you're buying my CDs...but you should go to www.LegalSounds.com. Every song, .09 cents! It's unbelievable. I've been downloading like a mofo!

Sadly my CDs aren't on the site, so you'll still have to pay a little more for them...but then again, I think it's worth it. :)

Been going up as Skippy a lot lately. I'm really loving it now. I've got new material as Skippy that I'm working out, so that's a whole lot of fun. Like for a while I was always doing the same jokes as Skippy. And yes they always worked, but I want to constantly be challenged by material, not comfortable with it. That goes for my act and Skippy's act. So now that I'm working on new stuff, it's much more fun for me and for the people who know Skippy's stuff.

I was at the HaHa Cafe the other night as Skippy and I noticed a guy texting while I was on stage. After the show he said, "I hope you don't think I was being rude because I was texting, I was just texting my girlfriend the knock-knock jokes. I've seen you on youtube and was a little star-struck when I saw you dressed up." And I said, "Oh, you saw me on youtube or Skippy?" And he said Skippy.

Fucking A man. Skippy is getting recognized now seperately from myself.

That's just unreal.

Moments like that are the things that make me confident in my talent and in the feeling that Skippy is going to be the thing that breaks me out.

OK, I've gotta get going. Got to buy another prop for the show and then hit the rehearsal.

I know that a lot of you aren't living in the LA area, but if you're around on any Saturday in February, come to the show. Did I mention it's free? Well it is.